I can't seem to make a seperate post so I'll post it in this thread:
So we're both in our twenties and we're both ready to be married. About 3 years of relationship, which has been great. She was very skinny when I met her, she gained until she's a tiny bit chubby now. At least her legs and ass are. Now I love her with all my heart. I just can't ignore my fetish though. I really want her to gain more weight, it's a major part of my sexuality. The progression, seeing her get softer and curvier. Seeing her female attributes expand and become more exaggerated. It's primal, I think. I've had this fetish since my childhood, though I did not think I would truly want this in practice this badly. She's been giving me mixed signals about gaining more. I've been grabbing her belly and thighs a lot and telling her how much I love her softness. During sex I told her how much it turned me on that she gained for me, and she replied that she would do anything for me as long as I kept fucking her like that. Sadly, today I brought up how much I liked her progression in the nudes she sent over the course of our relationship, and she said she wouldn't gain much more on purpose. She said she didn't want to eat more on purpose. To me, however, that is the hottest part. Wanting to get bigger, purposefully eating more to make herself more soft for my pleasure. Idk, it's just super hot to me. Now I loved and found her attractive when she was skinny too, but holy smokes the more she gains the more I'm just infatuated with her gaining 20-30kg over the course of the next few years. We've been dabbling in some light tied up BDSM, and I just can't get it out of my head to fantasize about funnel feeding her, and training her to stuff herself for her sexual pleasure and mine. So... I am very confused on what she wants, so I definitely need to talk to her about that. But I'll really have to be careful with my words, as I really don't want to appear like I'm unsatisfied with who she is. I love her to death. It's just a big part of my sexuality. I've been gradually opening up to her about that part of my sexuality, especially the last year. But from the get-go I've been all over her belly and such. Now I know she probably doesn't want to deal with the hassle of eating on purpose for me. On the flip side, I would just love it if I could get her to take sexual pleasure (out of submissiveness I guess) from eating more for me.
So, fellow bbw enthusiasts, how retarded am I? This fetish has always been a part of me, it's not like porn made me think this way, so even if I completely stop consuming this type of porn, it will not change my sexuality like that. How would you deal with my situation? Have you been in a similar situation?