How old are you? How many break ups have you had? This kind of reaction is common with younger less experienced people. I know it well because I used to be this same way, and many of my friends at the time as well. Coincidentally we were all a little bit in the spectrum The best medicine is time, and dating more people

>>86376 I’m a young adult right now, 18 going to be 19 in a couple months. And so far one break up. So, really a younger and inexperienced person like you said. Still starting life and learning adulthood, I do apologize if I sound like a fool.

>>86383 Don't apologize for being earnest and true. This site is a rough environment.

>>86383 Yeah... I wasn't trying to give you shit. I was just saying... This sounds exactly like something I or any of my friends would have written at 18 going on 19. It's entirely natural. This too shall pass. In 10 years you'll barely even remember being 18.

>>86391 Even if you did, I would understand. But you’re right, things come and go and years later I may not remember much. How are you doing though, hope everything is going well for you

>>86384 I have noticed the environment here is not so, welcoming to others. There is much hatred in a lot of people’s hearts on this site. I don’t understand it though, it’s strange to see. But I appreciate your words

Also landed a GF, but she's kinda the one thing keeping me going through a sea of bs. She's thin, but while I typically go for big girls, I find her so hot regardless

>>86419 I’m very glad you still find her hot and attractive, despite being thin. That’s very beautiful I think, I hope you two continue to have that wonderful relationship. The world is very tough and the waters of this sea are rough, but I am very glad things seem to be going well for you

Good Morning everyone, how is everyone today? Any big plans from anyone today or just a chill day? And remember that you are loved and appreciated

Re-connected with the old love who broke my heart after such a long time, finding she only left me because of a little avoidable mis-communication. She chose someone who looked just like me too, who got her pregnant super quickly. She suddenly said she was going to be gone for some little bit, which turned into weeks-I think she's in a dead marriage & he's the controlling type. It sounds like she lives in incredibly depressing life, mostly sleeps all day, isolated, little self-esteem... so I don't feel too upset at her. I know she's at-least safe, not trying to be a "I could fix her" guy. It's confusing while she's putting indirect, but huge hints about still wanting me, but unable to speak directly with the controlling husband. It feels sad to think of how close we were, and how close we still are, but still out of reach. I hope things change for the better.

>>86469 I am so sorry for you and to her, it’s sad that an avoidable miscommunication had happened but we all make mistakes and we’re only human. We aren’t perfect. And I feel bad that she is stuck with someone that’s very controlling, that doesn’t sound like a healthy thing in a relationship, nobody should be controlling anything and it pains me to hear this. I hope the both of you will be okay

>>86471 I appreciate your kindness, thank you friend.

Hey, i'm around your age at 19 and i've never had a relationship, youre doing much better than me in that regard, even if you broke up you still gained experience! Covid isolation really messed me up when i was getting into highschool, discovering bbwchan and coomer.party around that time also led my fat fetish pornography addiction to surge, meaning less time interacting with people and more time masturbating alone. I am slightly autistic which means i am not great with people anyways, but this situation really feeds into social anxiety and falling deeper into the rabbithole of hoarding more and more pornography. I'm sort of just drifting in my thoughts with adhd not getting any shit done, if i don't get into uni next year then my last chance at socializing is pretty much doomed. So tldr, autistic 19 year old, no social life, addicted to fat porn

>>86480 You know... As an almost 40 year old, at the time, it was lame that there were only like 3 pictures of fat women on the entire intentet. But, honestly, seems like we dodged a bullet. Not really possible to get coomer brained from 3 blurry low res images of teighlor on a greeting card from Spensors that was taken on the middle of the aisle in the store with a disposable camera in poor lighting

>>86481 Yeah, unrestricted internet access since age 7, discovering this stuff at the beginning of puberty meaning i have never gotten off to typical porn. Autism turns it into a special interest and obsession, and ADHD keeps distracting into thinking about that obsession.

Experiencing a breakup is honestly genuinely so devastating so I feel with you. In some ways it's like the death of a loved one, but the most compassion you get from people is a thats rough buddy and a pat on the back. It gave me thoughts I wasn't aware I was capable of having, that involved both hurting myself and others. Had no intent to act on these thoughts but it was incredibly scary nevertheless to have them pop up in my head. Luckily these thoughts are long gone. I imagine the first one is the worst but I've only had one breakup. It does get better but it took me literally months to go a day without thinking about her, and while I don't let it drag me down anymore in daily life, I feel the breakup did irreparable damage to me on what I expect from a relationship. Filling the days with activity does really help getting your minds off, myself I picked up sports which helped turning my mind to other things. In general the first reply is absolutely correct in his analysis. Time and dating others do heal things at least somewhat. We were also together for 4 months when we were 21, I'm 24 now so I have to say it's kinda stupid to still mope about this 3 years later about such a short relationship. It's not something I think about on a daily basis but still more often than I'm willing to admit. I'm not a big relationship person, and this is the first and only girl I've known that I actually was able to imagine living my rest of the life with. I've dated a few girls before and after this but it never felt right, and usually it was me who ended things because I didn't want a long term relationship with them. Reason why I still haven't recovered is that things were simply too perfect, she's genuinely one of the most gorgeous girls I have ever seen in my life. When I saw this blonde I knew I just had to get to know her, when we got to know eachother I found out we shared music taste, hobbies and in general had the same world view. She was crazy smart, studied something real prestigious and was very much a nepo baby but you could never tell and was incredibly humble. We have the same ethnicity which means my family would have absolutely adored her if they'd get to meet her. Appearance wise she was just in that sweet spot where she was fat enough to satisfy me sexually, but still look very much conventionally attractive. I know the descriptions sound dreamy, but as an usually cynical person when I'm trying to be absolute nitpicky and find things I didn't like about her as a way to try to cope with the breakup the biggest issues I could find about her was that her breasts were a bit on the smaller side and she had one ugly tattoo on her wrist she regretted. So my biggest complaints about her were absolute non-issues. Never had a fight or major disagreement. I have no doubt I will eventually find someone, I'm sure everyone in this thread who is single will eventually do that, but at the same time I have to be realistic and realise that the chances of finding a person that I'm this compatible with is very slim. I know the ideal partner doesn't have to be a female clone of yourself to have a good relationship, but after meeting x amount of women who's main interests is watching reality shows and tiktok it brought me so much joy being able to discuss 70's british rock album covers, old cars and politics with a genuinely intelligent person. Thanks to OP for opening up about his situation, and allowing others to write their experiences. I have briefly touched upon this topic on this chan but it felt good writing down the entire story. I consider myself rather satisfied with life but the aspect of relationships have been a touchy subject since in my mind I have already experienced absolute peak, and I'm deathly afraid I'll end up with someone I'm not compatible with.

>>86480 That is true, I did gain experience. And yeah Covid did mess up a lot of stuff for a bunch of folks, it sucks because we didn’t really get to interact with people and we were stuck at home. And that’s okay if you’re not great with people, lots of people aren’t good with others. I think you’ll do great in uni, and if things don’t go so well, don’t give up. It won’t be the end of the world, you gotta keep trying and pushing to the best of your ability. I believe in you.

>>86503 Your story touches my heart deeply, I heavily relate to this, it’s almost like we’re in the same boat. Even though we don’t know each other. It felt like death of a loved one, bad thoughts, and more. I’m still working on forgetting her and recovering, even though she said she doesn’t want me to forget her and keep the stuff she gave and made for me. She was perfect and an angel. Even your short description sounded like the one I lost. She moved on so so fast like two weeks later, and then kept talking to a lot of other guys too. We were in deep love but I felt like I was just another rebound for her after our break up. I don’t know if I’ll ever find love again to be truthful, it felt like luck that someone found me attractive, even though I’m extremely skinny and only 103 pounds. Which is kind of concerning for my health but I’ve always been like this and i don’t feel sick so I guess it’s okay. But thank you for sharing your story, it has touched me very very much. I wish nothing but the best for you, and to everyone else here too

>>86503 Oh man... That's a rough one. I mean, you will %100 find a girl you love and loves you back that's like... %95 as perfect as a girl like that. But you really don't too many girls like that. Could easily go your whole life never even meeting a single one, let alone one that likes you back.

I'm slowly coming to accept that I am legitimately retarded and this fetish is one of the signs